WORLD ECONOMICS
EXPLAINED WITH 2 COWS
SOCIALISM:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS, YOU GIVE ONE TO YOUR NEIGHBOR
COMMUNISM:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS, THE STATE TAKES BOTH AND GIVES YOU SOME MILK
FACISM:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS THE STATE TAKES BOTH AND SELLS YOU SOME MILK
BUREAUCRATISM:
THE STATE TAKES BOTH, SHOOTS ONE, MILKS ONE AND THROWS THE MILK AWAY
CAPITALISM:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS, SELLS 3 OF THEM TO YOUR PUBLIC LISTED COMPANY, USING LETTERS OF CREDIT
OPENED BY YOUR BROTHER IN LAW IN THE BANK AND THEN EXECUTE A DEBT EQUITY SWAP WITH AN ASSIOCIATED GENERAL OFFER SO THAT YOU GET ALL 4 COWS BACK WITH THE TAX EXCEMPTION OF
5 COWS, THE MILKRITE AND THE 6 COWS ARE TRANSFERRED VIA AN INTERMEDIARY TO A CAYMAN
ISLAND COMPANY SECRETLY OWNED BY THE MAJORITY SHAREHOLDER WHO SELLS THE RIGHT TO 7 COWS
BACK TO YOUR LISTED COMPANY, THE ANNUAL REPORT SAYS THAT THE COMPANY OWNS 8 COWS
WITH AN OPTION ON ONE MORE
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS YOU SELL ONE YOU BUY A BULL, YOUR HERD MULTIPLES THE ECONOMY GROWS
YOU SELL THEM AND RETIRES ON THE INCOME
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS YOU SELL ONE FORCE, THE OTHERS TO PRODUCE THE MILK OF 4 COWS
LATER YOU HIRE AN CONSULTANT TO ANALYZE WHY THE COWS DIED
FRENCH CORPORATION:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS, YOU GO ON STRIKE, ORGANIZE A RIOT, BLOCKS THE ROADS BECAUSE YOU
WANT 3 COWS
CHINESE CORPORATION:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS YOU HAVE 300 PEOPLE MILKING THEM, YOU CLAIM THAT YOU HAVE FULL
IMPLOYMENT AND HIGH PRODUCTIVITY YOU ARREST THE NEWSREPORTER WHO REPORTED THE
REAL SITUATION
INDIAN CORPORATION:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS, YOU WORSHIP THEM
A BRITISH CORPORATION:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS BOTH OF THEM MAD
AN IRAQ CORPORATION:
EVERYONE THINKS YOU GOT A LOT OF COWS, YOU TELL THEM YOU HAVE GOT NONE
NOBODY BELIEVES YOU SO THEY BOMB THE CRAP OUT OF YOU AND INVADE YOUR COUNTRY
YOU STILL HAVE NONE, BUT AT LEAST YOU HAVE A DEMOCRACY
AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION:
YOU GOT 2 COWS BUSINESS SEEMS PRETTY GOOD SO YOU CLOSE THE OFFICE AND GO FOR
A FEW BEERS TO CELEBRATE
A GREEK CORPORATION:
YOU HAVE 2 COWS BORROWED FROM THE FRENCH AND GERMAN BANKS YOU GET A CALL
FROM THEM THAT THEY WANT TO COLLECT THE MILK , BUT YOU CANT DELIVER SO YOU
CALL THE IMF SO THE IMF LOANS YOU 2 COWS YOU EAT BOTH OF THEM ,THE BANK AND THE IMF
CALLS TO COLLECT THEIR MILK AND COWS AND YOU GET A HAIRCUT.
AN IRISH CORPORATION:
YOU GOT 2 COWS ONE OF THEM IS A HORSE
Carsten Christensen©